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The Crabby Old Git on Cruising (A Laugh Out Loud Comedy) [Kindle Edition]

Phil Kingsman
3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (79 customer reviews)

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Book Description

Anchors Away for a Great Parody on Cruise Holidays!

Crabby’s best mate, Reg, has foolishly asked for his opinion on cruise holidays.

A self-appointed expert, the Old Git lets Reg have it with both propellers: Cabin grade and the effect it will have on his bank balance - and stomach; perils of the arrivals hall; the curse of the ship’s paparazzi – and then there’s the upgrade hustlers!

Reviews

Here’s what some lovely people have to say about the book...

“I think we could all relate this crabby old character to someone we know in real life.
Such a pleasant read that had me chuckling all the way through (slightly embarrassing on a train!)”

“Do you remember that series on BBC2, I think that it was called Grumpy Old Men, well move over the grumps, there's a new kid on the block. This book is a very witty and very funny look at the joys of cruising. I love this book and I sincerely hope that the Crabby Old Git will regale us all with some more of his refreshing outlook on life. I cannot recommend this book highly enough!!!”

“If you are looking for light hearted humour then this short story is for you. It made me laugh out loud. You do not have to have been on a cruise to enjoy this funny view of the cruising world.”

...And what else has Crabby to say?

How to avoid the bowels from hell
Sage words on sea sickness
Being alert for geriatric entertainers with books to flog

...And don’t get him started on the price of shore excursions!


You never know, his views may well have you rushing to book your next cruise holiday – just so you can spot the characters and sights that the Crabby Old Git talks about - and, of course, so you can experience that feeling only a cruise holiday can give you (if you know what I mean!)


Author's Note

The Crabby Old Git on Cruising is a short story of around 10,500 words. Although not a travel guide, Cabby’s tales are based on the author’s own (continuing!) experience of cruising!


Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 409 KB
  • Print Length: 53 pages
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: Phil Kingsman; 1 edition (5 Mar. 2013)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B00BPNIQZC
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Word Wise: Not Enabled
  • Average Customer Review: 3.9 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (79 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #27,940 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
  •  Would you like to give feedback on images?


More About the Author

Phil Kingsman lives in the beautiful County of Norfolk in the UK, where the sky is big, the land is flat and the wind goes through rather than around you in winter.

His writing is largely based on his own life experiences, an overactive imagination and the need to, in the words of his wife, "do something stimulating with his hands for a change." Her comments continue to puzzle Phil since he mainly uses a Dictaphone.

The inspiration for Phil's writing comes from his crackers sense of humour to celebrate the tendency of many who offer advice to others, whether asked for or not, the eccentricity of those (like him) of advancing years and that elite group of (mainly) men who, as he puts it "have hair growing from places they didn't have places 20 years ago"


Customer Reviews

Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Spot on! 17 Mar. 2013
Format:Kindle Edition
This very funny little book is written by an experienced cruiser who has obviously got a keen eye for the foibles and quirks of his fellow cruising passengers.Actually, although it is hilariously tongue-in-cheek, it might put some sensitive people off cruising but at least if you take the plunge (sorry!) it gives some useful pointers as to what happens on this type of holiday. Together with another very handy little guidebook I bought from Amazon called The Crafty Cruiser, How To Be A Crafty Cruiser between them they both tell you all you need to know about the pleasures and occasionally pitfalls, of a cruise holiday. Even if you don't take a cruise, it's worth it for the laughs.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Good fun 4 Feb. 2014
By Jean
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
A good comical read. You can imagine the the things happening as described by the writer. A ready good laugh book.
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2 of 2 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars the crabby old git on cruising 27 Jan. 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
great and very funny !st to read on my kindle got me hooked looking forward to anyother book getting use to kindle
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars I thoroughly enjoyed the humour in this book 2 July 2014
By Tracey
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I thoroughly enjoyed the humour in this book, very well written and funny. Really tells it as it is on a cruise! I would recommend it, and was sorry when I had finished it.

I also recently read 'Sicknote Goes Cruising, an Occasional Diary' by Dennis Richards which is a brilliant book bought via Amazon, , therefore pointing me to this book as it popped up on this site. I have only been on 5 cruise ships, so fairly new to cruising, the last one was P&O which I was inspired to try due to Dennis.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars a must for all cruisers 10 May 2014
By hosay
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
The funniest thing I've read in an age will recommend it to all fellow cruises on the p&0 discussion group
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars fun 4 Mar. 2014
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
Very gfood I'm pretty sure I'll buy more of this authors books. It waS SHORT but very enjoyable.I'd certainly reckomend it.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars True cruising 10 Jan. 2014
By Old Boy
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
This is a relatively true account of general cruising,and any cruiser knows he is the Crabby Old Git..with the wife (as described)
As is shown the "on board sale" happens at least weekly, but there was no mention of the continuous posse of stewards trying to force alcohol on you (especially if you are NOT all inclusive) to further lighten your wallet,even at brunch..
Whilst in port try negotiating with cab drivers for a cheaper trip than the organised tours (including senior discounts) on local trains.
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1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars Comical & true 10 Jan. 2014
By skipper
Format:Kindle Edition|Verified Purchase
I agree with all he said my wife must be a clone of his!!!! I gave the book title to my pal to read
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