Confessions of a Failed Anorexic [Kindle Edition]

This is not another step-by-step self-help book for those suffering with an eating disorder and the characters are not ANRED poster women dying to be thin (literally.) It is a thoughtfully written novel that allows us a sometimes uncomfortable peek inside the distorted thought process of the "average" woman you would not suspect of having an eating disorder. This book could be about your sister, best friend, the person you admire most -- but if you have ever had a battle with food vs weight vs happiness, it is likely hit closest to home about your own private thoughts.

Any woman who has ever struggled with the belief that if they only had more will power they could master their weight issues, and life will be perfect when the scale numbers dictate so, will find something to identify with in this short novel. It was painful to see inside Sarah's head as she obsesses over every bite of food to the point she misses out on the wonderful things already in front of her.

I would have loved a longer story, explaining in more detail Sarah's recovery process (which began with her heeding advice of an old high school friend she runs into at her 20th reunion) and continues after a tragic loss. Sarah's life is pretty rosy on the surface; she has a great husband, child, and fairly stable suburban life; her issues seem to stem more from horrible experiences as a child, teen and young adult. Some women facing inner demons must also battle ongoing challenges such as domestic abuse, financial insecurity, and other issues absent from this book. But maybe that is the point Cantrell is trying to make -- even people who seem to have it all don't really have it all.

Cantrell's book can help us recognize two things: we are not as alone in our distorted thinking as we might believe, and, that our self-loathing based on size and shape IS distorted thinking. Before anyone can get over an eating disorder they must first realize they have one. Because Cantrell's characters are not typical of exaggerated tortured women depicted in a Lifetime movie of the week it is easier to recognize that you don't necessarily have to weigh 80 lbs or put a finger down your throat 5 times a day to have an eating disorder. If food and scale numbers run your thought process and interfere with participating in and enjoying life, you should read this novel.

I flew this book! The way it was written, the humor, honesty, personality filled each page. I know so many moms and women who have this type of weight struggle as well as the other end of the spectrum. I understood so much of what was said and 'felt'. I rarely laugh or cry when i read but i did with this book. I was so surprised by it. I was expecting the typical eating disorder book, this was not at all typical. Wonderful read.

This book was honestly the worst book I have ever read. I wonder what it takes to publish a Kindle book on Amazon, but my guess is just a desire to do so. Its only saving grace is that I didn't have to pay for it, but was able to read it for free through Prime.

This is a fictitious account, but the introduction leads us to believe that the author is using personal experience to help write this book.

Let's discuss the technical aspects first. This book is RIDDLED with grammatical, punctuation and spelling errors. It's as though no one proofread it prior to its publication. It had me cringing at points because of the glaring errors contained on nearly every page. Further, besides the grammatical and spelling issues, it contained inconsistencies and ridiculous statements. For example, at location 774, the doctor tells her that she is 149 (discussing her weight) and she notes that she nearly states, "no, I'm 32", but then realizes that the doctor is talking about her weight and not her age. Later in the book, she talks about being 37 and also goes to her 20 year high school reunion indicating. How did no one notice this? Also, on one of her first runs ever, she states that she logged it into Sparkpeople as running a 10 mile per hour pace. Are you kidding me? 10 miles per hour? No. Maybe 10 minute miles, which would be a reasonable pace for someone already physically fit and I'd even give the character the benefit of the doubt that she was able to accomplish this, but 10 miles an hour is faster than in-shape male runners run, with the exception of competitive top tier athletes. The claim is just ridiculous and renders the reader unable to suspend disbelief enough to really absorb the story.

Trying my hardest to ignore the above, the story itself is terrible. The title implies that the character has an eating disorder. The introduction warns that the book might be triggering to people with an eating disorder. This book wouldn't trigger someone to go to a Weight Watchers meeting, let alone to fast or binge and purge. I am not sure where the author came up with this title, but it's inappropriate at best and irresponsible at worst. Certainly, Sarah has a weird relationship with food, but so do most American women (and many, many American men). She does force herself to purge once in the book (which, by the way, would not even meet the guidelines for a diagnosis of Bulimia). She mentions she hadn't done this since she was sixteen, yet the author, while writing entire CHAPTERS about Sarah's childhood, does not even touch on the subject of purging, but, for some reason unbeknown to me, treated us to a vivid account of Sarah with a "brown spot" in her underwear at 13 when she gets her first period, I am guessing in an effort to highlight the character beginning her journey into womanhood on a day that another child called her fat. I really am grasping at straws here.

Sarah's friend Stacy is some kind of attention-needing 40 year old who, quite obviously at one point in the novel, purges, yet Sarah can't seem to realize this. I find this bizarre because most bulimics or former bulimics can pick up on the signs of a forced purge. The woman "accidentally" locks the public restroom door? How dumb is Sarah? Ninety-nine percent of this story is filler. There is no real meat to anything that is being said, just a woman nearing 40 complaining about her life in general over page after page. There is no story at all, really. Additionally, Sarah's moment of realization of a "life that was lost" suddenly at the very end of the book was cheesy, over the top and ridiculous. The book ended abruptly without fleshing out a lot of things, like the trip to Disney that her husband proposes or her new photography hobby. Why were these things even MENTIONED? Nothing even happens with them. I think most women will find it difficult to sympathize with a woman whose husband loves her unconditionally, but who pawns her child off on him every evening to sit in front of Facebook. Boo hoo.

Even the Stacy story isn't fully fleshed out here. Stacy's mother mentioned eating disorders and Sarah just said, "she didn't have one", but then wondered. The end of that. What?

Overall, this story wouldn't be a good Facebook post, let alone a full novel and I'm really sad that Amazon has zero quality control over published Kindle novels. The 4 and 5 star reviews for this book are obviously fabricated by the author herself or her friends and family. Some reviewers mentioned things like it's a fresh look at eating disorders. What? WHAT EATING DISORDER? MAYBE Stacy had one, but the novel itself was so poorly written that you really couldn't tell either way.

Overall, I don't think this novel should have been written, but I DO hope the author gets an actual editor. Not because I think she SHOULD write another book, but because I'm afraid she WILL write another book and unsuspecting people will read it based on the same kind of fake reviews that suckered me and these potential readers will be subjected to the same horrible grammar, spelling, punctuation and continuity errors that just made this book completely unreadable. Awful.