At the top of the screen as I type this, Amazon is asking me to share anecdotes or 'interesting details about yourself...'.
I probably made it sound like I am special, but the reality of it, as I'm sure you'll be aware, is it asks EVERY author to do this. I know, they build you up then they beat you down!
Still, thinking about how to personalise my biography here is throwing up some interesting ideas.
My first idea was to write this:
Chris Pink is a 30 year old English writer and artist. He loves Yorkshire puddings and such things as having fun and reaching out to the world via his blog: www.cpink.wordpress.com...
Then I decided that that wasn't very original, and decided to write this:
I am 30. Three decades of age. I have long hair and a beard and used to eat a lot of chocolate but now don't as chocolate is bad for you and Chris Pink the writer does not endorse bad-for-you things.
When I read that out loud, that just sounded like it was wrtten by a really serious child who was trying to imagine being 30 years old.
Then I finally decided to write this:
You wake up in the morning and it's later than you'd like. This is because you got to bed VERY late the night/morning before as you were working very late getting carried away with writing your novel. It doesn't really matter anyway. You're Chris Pink, you're freelance, so who cares, right? And NOTHING SAYS FREELANCE LIKE BEING ABLE TO WAKE UP WHEN YOU WANT TO.
You go downstairs. In her kennel, your dog -- she's a bitch actually -- is lying there staring at you as if to say 'you have no idea how boring it is being a bitch.'
And to this, you say: "don't make me laugh. You have it easy, bitch."
Then you sit at your desk to work. You kid yourself work is what you are doing -- it isn't. The reality if the matter is that it takes a few minutes to get warmed-up. Also, you have to reply to a barrage of work emails first, and it's better to get them out of the way now. After you've written about 10 press releases you'll want to do anything but.
Now, depending on the day, you'll either be freelancing or avoiding that so you can do some blogging or novel writing. You choose the day.
And that, along with what I get up to on an average day, is the beauty of the 2nd person point of view.
Other things about me. If you really want to know.
1) Growing up I wasn't much of a reader or writer. I have Dyscalculia -- similar to Dyslexia, but with numbers -- so school wasn't exactly what you'd call "fun". Back in the 1980s and before, nobody believed in these things. Now, it's very different.
2) I have been / obtained the following things:
a) a BMX rider. I rode for about 15 years and was lucky enough to feature in a number of magazines and videos.
b) an artist (and I still am).
c) a trainee stonemason (I quit. Chipping stone is both boring and will give you some hideous disease if you breathe in enough dust).
d) a brown-belt in Karate. I probably should have done the next belt, and then I could have called myself a black-belt...
e) a photographic technician.
f) a picture-framer.
