My Child Has Autism, Now What?: 10 Steps to Get You Started [Paperback]

Our toddler son was placed on the spectrum this past month. My wife and I have already put together a team, plans, and have multiple therapies going. I have spent every available minute reading through dozens of books, combing online resources, asking questions, and seeking advocates in our area.

I am compelled to write this review because as a parent entering the "rollercoaster" that will be the rest of our lives as a family living with ASD. I have found this resource to be, by far, the best I have come across. No, it isn't going to dive into the experimental techniques or present comprehensive case studies, but that's a good thing.

I like lists. As a ASD parent, I have no time, so here is my list of reasons why, if you are dealing with the shock and overwhelming sense of helplessness like I am:

1. The book layout = immediate use and retention.

It uses the same learning retention strategies found in Head First books. Head First books teach advanced, abstract programming skills and concepts using the latest in learning theory. That is, its short, the pages are broken up with images, it uses common and direct language, lists positioned for photocopying, strategies are broken into steps, etc. I have struggled to get through the "popular" books on this subject because they are *very* poorly structured primarily because they are based on the spectrum (the out-of-sync child books), and not, daily needs and events. I had to deconstruct one of those books and put together my own lists because there was no way we were going to retain any of the knowledge. Here, however, each "step/section" has a Why, What and How, Suggestions, When, and Learn More. I professional design and develop software patterns for enterprise Healthcare IT, and that is the exact recipe we have used to great success. It's a quick hit with layers of information if you have time. She also uses brilliant metaphors that any of us can relate to. I especially liked her explanation of why what appears to be regressive behavior is anything but. She speaks to functional learning as a way for the body to assimilate patterns that we do cognitively (those are my words, i am an uber nerd, so, don't take my writing style as an indication of hers).

2.It explains what your therapist is doing, backs it up with researched evidence, and shows how you can efficiently extend it

She does a brilliant job of answering all the questions I had in a sentence or less. She references research here and there, some of which I had read in relation to my work. In fact, 2 or 3 things our OT mentioned today were in here cross-referenced to longitudinal research studies.

3. It's short but packed with info

Less is more. And I appreciate that. She doesn't waste time on junk/pop science 'The only experts in autism is a person with autism". She very carefully thought about each word she put down knowing that the brevity would make the gold nuggets that more poignant.

4. The order follows the hierarchy of needs

Step 1 is sleeping, eating, and pooping. Without sleep, young brains cannot develop. Without food, young brains cannot develop. And with my son, pooping is where everything is getting backed up. If you don't take care of those things first, nothing that follows matters because a tired, malnourished child cannot progress.

This is a brand new book. I suspect that it will become a valuable resource recommended by care teams and OTs for parents. I am more than happy to come back here in a few years and let everyone know how it works out.

I also recommend "The Autism Mom's Survival Guide", which I finished tonight before picking up this book, for the big picture narrative.

I can perhaps see why the book title may misrepresent it. I picked it up on a particular desperate night in our local niche bookseller where they carefully select each and every book in stock. An alternative subtitle might be "The Lean Six-Sigma guide for parents and their ASD child"

It's not easy trying to figure out how many stars to give this book. Although I found most of it to be well written with information potentially very useful to a parent with an autistic child, the author makes blanket statements in favor of unproven and disproven treatment methods that ultimately might offset the usefulness of everything else.

My immediate advice to any readers is to take everything in this book as just suggestions on things that might be beneficial to your child, and don't count on anything to work for sure until you've given it a try and found positive results for yourself.

Both of our children, an 8-year-old daughter and a 12-year-old son, are autistic, and we as a family have struggled through many extremely difficult years desperately trying to find ways to deal with the problems their condition causes in their schools, among our extended families, and in society in general. My son has always used tactile forms of communication when he gets excited, which means he often casually touches people when he likes them and pushes (or hits) others when he gets upset, all of which are very frowned upon in our culture. My daughter goes off into her own world without seeming to understand what's being told to her, then she suddenly she breaks out into hysterics at what seem to others to be trivial offenses, or she bursts into loud singing and wild giggling fits to the disruption of those around her. Both children have been measured to have very high intelligence (enough to put them into gifted classrooms), but their autistic mindsets cause them to fall behind other children their age in some of the simplest activities (such as potty training, which led my daughter to being the only child in her kindergarten who still needed to wear a diaper to class).

Our children's issues manifested at an early age, so we dove into doing research and attempting solutions, using every avenue possible. We slowly found some good information and techniques, but we also encountered a lot of ideas and theories (often from well-meaning individuals) that proved worse than useless, not only wasting large amounts of our time but even potentially causing damage to our child's development (such as by allowing our children to be in the care of teachers who directed overly harsh approaches to problems).

As I read "My Child Has Autism, Now What?" I thought about our struggles and wished we had had a book like this presented to us when our children were toddlers. Many of the methods the author presents were ones we found extremely useful in helping our own children, such as developing very distinct routines in the day, using sensory-integration techniques as a way for our children to focus their energies, simplifying areas of the home (in particular, severely limiting distractions such as the television and video games), and using music to create a calming atmosphere (particularly at night after the children were tucked into bed). I wish we had known years ago what we know now about how school systems are legally required (when formally requested) to test children at a very early age to determine if they require special assistance (and to provide the assistance at no charge if needed). Without a doubt, the author's list of resources on finding information on that and other issues is wonderful. Several chapters of this book presented some great ideas on taking what we've already done even further, and I'm looking forward to applying some of her techniques in attempt to make our lives calmer and more under control.

That being said, the book has some serious problems. In particular, I was appalled when Kidd presented an entire chapter on "biomedical intervention." She started the chapter saying there has been an increase in research attempting to "cure" autism, as if it's a disease like cancer or tuberculosis. Autism, simply put, is not a disease, any more than being left handed or having gender-identity disorder. It's a way a person's brain is wired from before birth, and it's not something that can be changed with drugs, herbs, vitamins, avoiding milk or eating different types of breakfast cereal (all of which some so-called "experts" have recommended as potential "cures" for autism in children). Unfortunately, in chapter eight of the book, Kidd reveals she falls into the camp of the many parents who blame technology and culture (by attacking artificial colors and preservatives) while desperately clinging to the hope that a magical treatment exists that can undo the way their child was formed by nature. Yes, it's possible that some chemicals in our culture affect the behavior of an autistic child in ways that they don't affect a child without autism, but such ideas haven't been proven yet in independent case studies, and where they do seem to work they definitely don't benefit every child to an equal amount. However, Kidd seems to feel that putting your child on a lactose-free, gluten-free, organic diet is the way to go for fighting the issues caused by an autistic brain. She flat out lists the "steps to health" for an autistic child are adding supplements, regulating their diet, "detoxifying" their system (by using "earth-friendly" soaps and toothpastes), and even modifying or delaying their scheduled vaccinations (which she said could "disturb their development"). The book would be greatly improved if the chapter on "biomedical intervention" was entirely removed from the rest of the text, or at most moved to a minor appendix listing unproven theories.

Finally, I had a hard time taking the book seriously at times because of the writer's style. The layout was occasionally confusing and unprofessional, and her choice of fonts made it seem like the book was intended more for children than their parents. It was apparent Kidd was trying to present a friendly tone and make her work easily readable, but sometimes I felt she was dumbing things down and even being patronizing. For example, one chapter has the following instruction for parents: "... notice any change in behavior, language, sleeping, and eliminating (yes, pooping!)." I would think than any adult reading this could figure out "eliminating" has to do with bodily wastes, but couldn't the author had used something like "bowel movements" instead of reaching to the level of "pooping"?

Overall, this book had several chapters that I would rate individually with four or five stars. Unfortunately, the author's style of writing and the presentation of the book at most rate three or four stars. Worst of all, though, the author presents unproven and potentially damaging theories as if they're tried-and-true medical pathways to success, and that sheds a poor light, casting doubt on everything else in the volume.

So the most I can give this book is an iffy three stars. I would definitely recommend that the parents of a young child with autism read Kidd's work, but with a warning to take what the author says with a grain of salt at times - and to have a huge block of it nearby during a couple of the later chapters.

__ Reviewed by Brianna __

A diagnosis of autism brings parents terror, as they have no idea what will happen to their child next. "My Child has Autism, Now What?: 10 Steps to Get You Started" is an advisory for parents who have learned of their child's autistic condition and have no idea what to do next, no idea of how this changes things for them. Susan Larson Kidd, a professional who has been dealing with autism for 25 years, offers her vast expertise and comes to readers with plenty of wisdom. "My Child Has Autism" is a must for any parent overwhelmed by the new world they have entered into.