The Cauldron (Paperback)

If so, I am definitely giving up work now. I have never read a book that has actually made me wince before.

The characters are so two dimensional they almost fall over in a slight puff of wind. The plot is so poorly constructed, it is almost laughable.

For example, rather conveniently, the baddy repeats everything her boss says to her over the mobile phone, within hearing of a goody: "What's that? You're flying to Newquay on the chopper? You're flying on to Heathrow and then on to San Francisco in the jet?"

Also, by reading the first few pages, and the blurb on the back, you know that the baddy is a multi-billionaire industrialist with interests in electronics (Silicon Valley gets a few mentions) and armaments. You also know he is thick as thieves with a maverick seismologist. He is seen studying a map of California "with strange, squiggly lines" on it. The deputy head of the British Secret Service thinks he has a faint idea of the baddy's plan. My three year old son could work out his plan, given these clues!

I will certainly not be wasting my money on any of Forbes' works again.

Having been encouraged to buy this work by a description of Colin Forbes as 'one of a kind', I sincerely hope he is.

There is no doubt that this is not intended to be anything other than an easy airport read, totally bereft of characterisation, and unbelievable plots you could drive a coach and horses through. Don't get me wrong, I have read and enjoyed many over the years, but this is truly appalling.

A few random rants...the characters are only identified with reference to the marques of the cars they drive or the type of gun they carry, the stunningly crass dialogue, obvious devices (repeating verbatim conversations from the other side of the phone), the intelligence people who take 200 pages longer than the reader to brilliantly work out that two identical looking people might (shock, horror) be twins, and the pointless forays of the 'intelligence' people into the enemy territory (blow up the gates, climb over the walls, throw some grenades, then shout 'let's get out of here', pausing in their flight only to rummage through a bin which luckily contains the key map, which the brilliant bad guy 'strategist' didn't think was worth shredding). I could go on.

This Forbes is a ridiculous work, badly plotted, totally un-engaging and really very irritating. In short, it is badly written. Shame on the publishers for accepting this rubbish, and shame on you, Forbes.

I have read the review by a reader, who seems to think he could do better. I have no doubt, sir, that you could.

Please don't buy this rubbish ...