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Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children [Paperback]

Daniel A. Hughes
4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (36 customer reviews)
Price: 26.95 & FREE Delivery in the UK. Details
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Book Description

28 Aug 2006
"Building the Bonds of Attachment" is the second edition of a critically and professionally acclaimed book for social workers, therapists, and parents who strive to assist poorly attached children. This work is a composite case study of the developmental course of one child following years of abuse and neglect. This work focuses on both the specialized psychotherapy and parenting that is often necessary in facilitating a child's psychological development and attachment security. It blends attachment theory and research, and trauma theory with general principles of both parenting and child and family therapy in developing a model for intervention. This work is a practical guide for the adult - whether professional or parent - who endeavor to help such children.

Frequently Bought Together

Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children + Attachment, Trauma and Resilience: Therapeutic Caring for Children + A Child's Journey Through Placement
Price For All Three: 54.93

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Product details

  • Paperback: 272 pages
  • Publisher: Jason Aronson; 2nd Revised edition edition (28 Aug 2006)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0765704048
  • ISBN-13: 978-0765704047
  • Product Dimensions: 23 x 15.4 x 1.6 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (36 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 12,339 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
  • See Complete Table of Contents

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Review

Everyone's read them-those books that fundamentally change the way you look at things. Before reading Building the Bonds of Attachment, I had read a great deal on the subject. Despite recurring behavioral problems with my older child, I thought I was on the right track. Then I read Hughes's book and finally understood what I had to do help my daughter. This is the book I'd recommend to every adoptive parent. -- Ann Keisling Adoptive Families Magazine I thought the first edition of Building the Bonds of Attachment a magnificent book and recommended it to everyone I knew. The changes in the second edition make it even more essential reading for all who care for and work with children who have suffered neglect, loss, and trauma, and therefore haven't a clue about how to love and connect with others. This beautifully realized story of a young girl's struggle to learn how to love makes gripping reading and will be an inspiration for all those whocare for troubled children. In dramatized form the book presents a model both for the kind of therapy and the equally important kinds of parenting, that are needed to awaken love in deeply troubled children. The approach, which is securely founded inthe very latest research about trauma, attachment and brain development clearly lays out the kinds of care that a child needs in order to overcome the scarring effects of early neglect and frightening physical abuse. An important new emphasis is on the crucial importance of caregivers' understanding and coming to terms with their own early attachment experiences. This is a must read book that will have a profound influence on the whole field of treatment of troubled children. -- Phyllis B. Booth, MA, LCPC, LMFT, RPT/S, director of training at the Theraplay Institute Daniel Hughes has once again proven his keen insight into the psyches of unattached children. This book is filled with gems of wisdom about the therapeutic parenting of wounded children and the often counterintuitive ways one has to respond to their behavior. Through the voices of a foster mother, psychotherapist, and social worker, Hughes creates a pattern for understanding, empathizing, and treating these vulnerable and provocative children in a manner than can bring true healing, not just temporary relief. In this edition, Hughes has added the importance of having the mother look into her own attachment issues to ensure that the child can feel safe enough to relinquish control to her, an essential step toward self-regulation. This book is a must-read for all adoptive and foster parents and the professionals who work with them. -- Nancy Verrier, adoptive mother, psychotherapist, and the author of The Primal Wound and Coming Home To Self Dr. Hughes has done the impossible: take the gold standard in practical texts for both the clinician and the foster or adoptive family, and make it better, by nearly any measure. Where would we have been without the first edition of this clear-headed, practical, clinically sound book? And now Dr. Hughes has taken the courageous step of modifying some of his own ideas and recommendations, in accord with new research, and the honing of his own views through continued clinical practice. -- Michael Trout, author of The Jonathon Letters, Director of The Infant-Parent Institute, Inc I thought the first edition of Building the Bonds of Attachment a magnificent book and recommended it to everyone I knew. The changes in the second edition make it even more essential reading for all who care for and work with children who have suffered neglect, loss, and trauma, and therefore haven't a clue about how to love and connect with others. This beautifully realized story of a young girl's struggle to learn how to love makes gripping reading and will be an inspiration for all those who care for troubled children. In dramatized form the book presents a model both for the kind of therapy and the equally important kinds of parenting, that are needed to awaken love in deeply troubled children. The approach, which is securely founded in the very latest research about trauma, attachment and brain development clearly lays out the kinds of care that a child needs in order to overcome the scarring effects of early neglect and frightening physical abuse. An important new emphasis is on the crucial importance of caregivers' understanding and coming to terms with their own early attachment experiences. This is a "must read" book that will have a profound influence on the whole field of treatment of troubled children. -- Phyllis B. Booth, MA, LCPC, LMFT, RPT/S, director of training at the Theraplay Institute

About the Author

Daniel A. Hughes, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist who specializes in child abuse and neglect, attachment, foster care, and adoption. He resides in Maine and actively trains other therapists in the model of treatment known as Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy, both within the United States and in other countries.


Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5 stars
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
43 of 43 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I read this first when I was fostering my (now) adopted daughter. It was like being given a translation dictionary for a language I didn't speak. It helped me understand and communicate how much I loved her and wanted to help. I bought it again recently because I need it for continual reference. Buy it, read it, re-read it. No-one else told me this stuff! Everyone said the naughty step works (which it does for children who aren't disturbed). Children who have sufferred need a different approach. Thank you Dan Hughes.
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64 of 65 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Applying the theory of trauma 13 Sep 2007
Format:Paperback
As a foster carer, this book has been critical in enabling me to understand the children I care for even though they are teenagers.

It documents in detail how one foster carer who works closely with Daniel Hughes, manages a difficult and traumatised child. This presents the concepts of trauma in the process of caring, and present practical methods without being didactic, that can be applied intelligently in other situations. The more theoretical analysis of the care that accompanies each chapter allowed me to use to the best possible extent, the information that I gleaned from the book.

I eventually understood the implications for traumatised children as they become adolescent and traumatised; because very few teenagers who come into care have resolved their early childhood trauma.

Dan Hughes' explanations also helped me a lot in understanding the timescales involved in this kind of therapy, which can be longer than you ever imagine. A must for anyone who is working with children.
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51 of 52 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
If you are experiencing such problems, do read "Building the Bonds of Attachment" by Daniel Hughes.
Our daughter and her husband adopted a lovely two year old boy. They were given no information of the damage caused to him during his first year of abuse and abandonment by those to whom he looked for love, protection and sustenance, his parents. Eventually the infant was removed and Fostered, though sadly this was to a woman, poorly monitored and without the ability to cope with her own children let alone those Fostered by her. Neither his Parents nor his Foster Carer had the ability to give him the love, structure and confidence in adults that all children need to build bonds of loving trust with those controlling their lives.
Our Daughter and Son-in-Law spent five years in a desperate search to understand how they could help their loved but hugely demanding adopted son to control his rages and inexplicable behaviour. His school did try to understand him but still excluded him a day for bad behaviour.
Daniel Hughes's book was a revelation to them and to me. It confirmed that some things that they had tried were mistaken but others could be built upon. At last they and their son are to receive real Attachment Disorder Syndrome Counselling and find the hope of enabling their little boy to let go of his perception of being bad and in exchange learn to love and trust his new family in complete confidence.
Read this book with relief that, with the correct counselling, there can be a good future for such tormented children, avoiding the
life of crime and prison which would otherwise be their lot, to become the happy settled person locked inside.
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136 of 141 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A must-read for foster parents! 14 May 1999
By A Customer
Format:Hardcover
Dan Hughes wrote this book with me in mind. I read this book while fostering a 9 yr old girl who had attachment disorder that, without proper treatment, would have destroyed her ability to function in a normal life. There were ideas and strategies in this book that worked (no matter how strange they sound). Dan Hughes knows what he is talking about. As a professional foster parent, I appreciate the straightforward language used in this book. I would recommend this to any person dealing with an attachment disorder child. It brings a much needed awarness to this overwhelming issue in surrogate parenting.
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13 of 14 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars It's was about my little one! 30 Oct 2009
Format:Paperback
Must read for anyone thinking about adopting a neglected child. I was amazed to be reading about my little one. This book is now being passed to family members to enable them to understand why I handle my little one the way I do. I'm not going mad and I'm doing the right thing and it was nice to find a book that made me realise this.Building the Bonds of Attachment: Awakening Love in Deeply Troubled Children
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12 of 13 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Building the bonds of attachment 1 Dec 2009
Format:Paperback
A really fantastic book. I have been fostering for five years and I think that all fostering agencies ought to give all their new foster carers this book to read before they begin to foster. A hugh insight to the 'life' these children have before they come to us and how their actions are a pure result of their past. It was easy to read although slightly Americanized with words like 'sweetie' & 'mom' but it has been invalueable and I really didnt want to put it down.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars Building the bonds of attachment. 20 Nov 2011
By Lucy
Format:Paperback|Verified Purchase
This is a really good read, worrying, as it reflects different parts of each of my two adopted daughters. Gives some good ideas on dealing with different situations. A really good resource and easy to read too.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read 30 Dec 2012
By M. Reed
Format:Paperback
I'd heard a great deal of praise for this book and wondered if it could possibly live up to the hype. Well it does, and then some. As a social worker with a great deal of experience working with foster carers, and with a background looking after children in residential settings, I can honestly say that Daniel Hughes' insight in to the experiences of abused and traumatised children is inspirational.

The book is easy to read. The combination of narrative followed by commentary makes it accessible in a way that many text books aren't. Katie, though herself a fictional character, personifies the stories of so many children I have known over the years. It is obvious from the very first page that Dan Hughes cares profoundly about these children and wants the reader to care too. One becomes immersed in Katie's story, willing her and those around her to heal the deep wounds caused by the abuse she has suffered at the hands of her parents.

The book shows how important it is we get things right from the outset. It demonstrates how when we don't we can compound the harm done to children in our care. That said, this book is about optimism. We can make a difference and we can work hard to ensure that children like Katie have a future. This book deserves to, and ought to, be read by everyone working with "deeply troubled children".
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
3.0 out of 5 stars Three Stars
good real for foster carers
Published 9 hours ago by antony millington
5.0 out of 5 stars a great book and great for reference material
need this for work, a great book and great for reference material
Published 3 days ago by Mrs. Mary Gilbert
4.0 out of 5 stars Building the bonds of attachment by Daniel a Hughes
Very clear plus like a story so entertaining I'd asked a therapist what was new in therapy these days band she had suggested the book
Published 1 month ago by Laura de la Iglesia
5.0 out of 5 stars Fabulous
Fab book really easy reading and understanding great if your thinking of fostering or even if ur just trying to understand a child
Published 2 months ago by Miss Alison Cook
5.0 out of 5 stars A brilliant book
very informative clearly written. I can understand the process.
good clear ideas food for thought. A very emotive subject but necessary to have an understanding of this.
Published 2 months ago by penny
5.0 out of 5 stars Very powerful
This book has transformed my understanding of my adopted son and what attachment needs to be. I highly recommend it.
Published 2 months ago by Lee
3.0 out of 5 stars An informative book, interesting but hard to get into in parts
I purchased this book after fostering a challenging little girl, certain parts made sense and did help. Read more
Published 2 months ago by gabriel
4.0 out of 5 stars a bit hard going at farst but once into it you can not put it down
my son is adopting a child of seven, and I hoped it would give an insight to the problems he might face, it did this and more, I so wish i had read it before I had my own family, I... Read more
Published 3 months ago by Mrs. F. Chandler
5.0 out of 5 stars easy to read
This book is very easy to read because it is a fictional case study so the reader becomes involved in the foster child's story. Read more
Published 3 months ago by justkeeptrying
5.0 out of 5 stars A GAME CHANGER!
I am a new head teacher in a PRU & have recently begun training in the Thrive FTC Approach - a way of working with children who display challenging behaviour. Read more
Published 3 months ago by Amazon Customer
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