Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star [Blu-ray] [2011] [US Import]

Another amateurish piece of cinematic trash from the Happy Gilmore writing desk of Adam Sandler and Nick Swardson. This not even remotely funny movie revolves around the adventures of the titular character Bucky Larson...who has buck teeth (hence the name Bucky, get it) a Dutch boy haircut, and a small penis. This Iowa dimwit (all Iowans are depicted as morons) heads for the bright lights of Hollywood to pursue a career as a porn star after discovering that both his parents were 70's porn stars. Many agonizing twists and turns later, Bucky rises to fame and has an unlikely romance with Kathy (Christina Ricci) a sweet waitress in a dismal diner. The only bright light in this otherwise dim bulb of a film, Ricci's character is pleasant and restrained. Why such a talented actress would allow herself to appear in this stink-bomb remains a total mystery.
This nauseating movie finally arrives at it's one truly captivating moment...the closing credits. Bucky Larson may have been born to be a star but the same cannot be said for Nick Swardson or anyone else associated with this debacle.

I cannot for the life of me figure out who thought this movie was a good idea but I can guess you'll probably find them working at a Burger King near you right about now. Directed by a guy named Tom Brady (which probably has the star quarterback considering a lawsuit) who also directed Rob Schneider's The Animal and The Hot Chick. Bucky Larson happens to have the lowest IMDB rating I've come across yet for a film that had wide release. 2.1 is not going to cut it these days. Need more convincing? Fine, how's a 9/100 metacritic rating for you? I wouldn't be surprised if nobody hires this director again, not even for a youtube video.

Do not purchase this film based on people giving it 5 star and 4 star reviews. That's saying that there's no movie better. Check other sources first if you're on the fence. This movie should have never been made.

Stay as Far as you can from this atrocity and buy something good like the Benchwarmers (I know that was horrible to but you at least laughed).

What was clearly the 1st sign of what direction "Bucky" was heading into is when we saw an inbreed farmer (probably left over from Deliverance) smacked peanut butter all over his Junk so his goat could "snack" on it, this was still in the middle of the intro credits before we even get to Bucky himself. Once the Peanut Butter and Goat credits finally ended we see Bucky at his job as a grocery sacker at "Fooders" where his boss played by Curtis Armstrong (AKA Booger) fires poor Bucky (Not clear why but it does not really matter anyways). I'll skip over the dinner seen with Bucky's Parents and get to where Bucky goes to his friends house to watch a new movie. The movie that Bucky watches (And at the same time gets off to) is a 1970's porno of his parents. At this point Bucky realizes his destiny and decides to go to Hollywood to be a porn star. The rest of this you will have to rent from Red Box and experience the holocaust yourself, I can't bring myself to type anymore. I'm having violent flashbacks as it is with the little I managed to hammer out. Please GOD, Strike down these unholy images from my brain! Take me to my special place where I may forget.

My first thoughts was to trash both my TV and Blu-Ray player so I could sanctify my entertainment system but came to my senses in time before I had found my sons metal bat in the garage. Upon returning "Bucky" back to the Red Box Kiosk I hesitated briefly because I was afraid the machine would abruptly catch fire after inserting Bucky back into it, luckily it went without incident.

I never truly recognized how bad the economy had gotten until watching Bucky, seeing good actors like Don Johnson, Christina Ricci, Stephen Doriff, Jimmy Fallen, Curtis Armstrong and Pauly Shore (Yes I said Pauly Shore, Bio-Dome was a park walk with what Nick Swardson did) give up what integrity they may have had to actually use their real names with this movie.

The really sad thing my son who is an Adam Sandler fan (as myself) is hoping that Adam just put his name on the script and can have plausible deniability that he had any "creative input" concerning this abomination. Before anybody says anything we are not defending the stuff that Adam has put out over the years but you can usually get a laugh even if it was unintentional. This cannot be said for this unholy horror. I'm just hoping after this Adam Sandler revives Rob Schneider's mediocre career, it will be a welcome site after seeing Nick's first starring role.

So in Conclusion both I and my Son who are both card carrying Golden Razzberry Members have found what will be our sure fire pick for the 32nd Razzies this year.