I love Paris Hilton, but the woman just can't act a lick. I didn't think she was all that bad in House of Wax, but Bottoms Up might as well have been titled Thumbs Down. As far as I can tell, both Paris and Jason Mewes are distinguished graduates of the Hayden Christensen School of Acting, and they decided to have a full-fledged act-off to prove, once and for all, which of them is the least talented actor/actress in the universe. Unfortunately, it's impossible to determine a winner because they're equally bad. Jason Mewes and Kevin Smith may be pretty entertaining when they're together, but Mewes is just helpless when he's on his own (Kevin Smith is in this movie, but it's only a small role, and he and Mewes are only together for a minute or two).
Mewes plays Owen, a Minnesota boy who goes to Hollywood to compete in a big bartender's contest, hoping to use the prize money to save his dad's steakhouse. Since he's basically broke, he stays with his outrageously-gay-but-pretending-to-be-straight uncle Earl (David Keith, the only cast member who put any effort at all into his role). Earl works for a tabloid news show - until, that is, the uber-famous Lisa Mancini (Paris Hilton) gets him fired. That's when Earl and Owen vow revenge on Lisa, her hunk-of-the-month boyfriend Hayden Field (Brian Hallisey), and their whole hoity-toity crowd. A little dishonesty goes a long way, gaining Owen access to Hollywood's in crowd. As he gets to know them, however, he begins to see that their images don't necessarily reflect their true selves. Could it be that the fantabulous Lisa Mancini isn't truly a party girl, and that there's actually a human being in there somewhere? Who knows? Who cares? With its terribly weak script and consistently bad acting, any point this movie even tries to make is moot at best.
I'm giving the film two stars because I did enjoy seeing a couple of annoying characters get what they deserve in the end, and David Keith's way-over-the-top performance can be pretty entertaining. There's Keith going all out for his role, while everyone else just sleepwalks through the entire movie. DK, this second star's for you, buddy.