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17 of 19 people found the following review helpful
Format:DVD
As the trailer so proudly boasts it is "A Uwe Boll Production", a sentence that might make most moviegoers reach for their collective crucifixes and stakes, but to bad movie connoisseurs it means that they have hit gold.
Where to begin...
The story concerns Rayne, a half human half vampire who swears revenge on master vampire Kagan and with the help of covert anti-vamp organisation Brimstone seeks 3 artifacts that could end his reign.
As ever, Herr Boll has assembled a cast that way outclasses the shabby material that they star in.
Oscar winning actor (Sir) Ben Kingsley plays Kagan, reciting his lines with the passion of someone reading the phonebook and treats the whole experience with a kind of bored contempt.
Lost and Fast & Furious actress Michelle Rodriguez spends the whole film looking angry, although to be fair I suspect that is her default setting.
Michael Madsen allegedly spent a lot of the film drunk and looks bored to tears with it all, as well as slightly embarrassed at sporting a medieval style mullet.
International singing star Meat Loaf has an extended cameo as some sort of vampire pimp surrounded by a harem of topless babes, some of whom are clearly time travellers, as I suspect that breast implants were not readily available in the Middle Ages.
Billy Zane has a couple of scenes and is a breath of fresh air, as his breezy insouciance contrasts nicely with the eye popping overacting of the henchman threatening him.
The cast bounces from one end of Romania to the other while their accents wander even further than they do, and the film boasts possibly the least erotic sex scene in the history of cinema.
What the film lacks in other ways though, it makes up in blood.
Gallons of the stuff.
So much so that I did wonder if they got given a hefty discount. Every swipe of the sword is accompanied by a bathful of the red stuff, squirting everywhere with gay abandon. In the world of Bloodrayne, a simple papercut would drain you in seconds, as the sheer force of arterial spray would propel you vigourously backwards through the air.
In summary, this is a Bad Film, but also an enjoyable one. To the director I can only offer this pearl of wisdom, taken from this very masterpiece - "I suggest you grow in wisdom".
Where to begin...
The story concerns Rayne, a half human half vampire who swears revenge on master vampire Kagan and with the help of covert anti-vamp organisation Brimstone seeks 3 artifacts that could end his reign.
As ever, Herr Boll has assembled a cast that way outclasses the shabby material that they star in.
Oscar winning actor (Sir) Ben Kingsley plays Kagan, reciting his lines with the passion of someone reading the phonebook and treats the whole experience with a kind of bored contempt.
Lost and Fast & Furious actress Michelle Rodriguez spends the whole film looking angry, although to be fair I suspect that is her default setting.
Michael Madsen allegedly spent a lot of the film drunk and looks bored to tears with it all, as well as slightly embarrassed at sporting a medieval style mullet.
International singing star Meat Loaf has an extended cameo as some sort of vampire pimp surrounded by a harem of topless babes, some of whom are clearly time travellers, as I suspect that breast implants were not readily available in the Middle Ages.
Billy Zane has a couple of scenes and is a breath of fresh air, as his breezy insouciance contrasts nicely with the eye popping overacting of the henchman threatening him.
The cast bounces from one end of Romania to the other while their accents wander even further than they do, and the film boasts possibly the least erotic sex scene in the history of cinema.
What the film lacks in other ways though, it makes up in blood.
Gallons of the stuff.
So much so that I did wonder if they got given a hefty discount. Every swipe of the sword is accompanied by a bathful of the red stuff, squirting everywhere with gay abandon. In the world of Bloodrayne, a simple papercut would drain you in seconds, as the sheer force of arterial spray would propel you vigourously backwards through the air.
In summary, this is a Bad Film, but also an enjoyable one. To the director I can only offer this pearl of wisdom, taken from this very masterpiece - "I suggest you grow in wisdom".
15 of 17 people found the following review helpful
Format:DVD
I first heard about this film when somebody said it was one of the worst films ever made, so naturally I had to see it for myself. And I have to say I was disappointed, but not in the way you would expect. It's not so bad that it's unbearable, but nor is it so bad that it's good (like say Ed Wood's 'Plan 9 From Outer Space').
Yes, there is a lot wrong. The pace is completely messed up. The action continues on quite quickly, whatever is happening, which makes a change as most films with pace problems are far too slow, but ti means that emotional high and low points aren't given the attention they need to make an impact, there is no suspense and no build up making the ending very disappointing. It's also obvious that the actor's didn't have any fight training, and some of the acting is awful - none worse than Ben Kingsley though who manages with incredible skill, to bring absolute zero depth to his character and reels off his lines like he's reading a laundry list. Then there are other problems like the wholly unecessary flashbacks (especially the later one) and the info dumps put in so the audience aren't wondering whatever happened to the plot.
All that said, it could have been a lot worse. Loken fits the bill perfectly, capturing Rayne's elegance, beauty and ferocity very well. They even got her look right. The action is entertaining enough (if only because it's stupidly gory at times), but because of the fast pace it washes over you quite quickly and it ends up being moderately enjoyable despite it all.
In summary, its worth watching if you're a Bloodrayne or action/vamp. fan but don't expect too much.
Yes, there is a lot wrong. The pace is completely messed up. The action continues on quite quickly, whatever is happening, which makes a change as most films with pace problems are far too slow, but ti means that emotional high and low points aren't given the attention they need to make an impact, there is no suspense and no build up making the ending very disappointing. It's also obvious that the actor's didn't have any fight training, and some of the acting is awful - none worse than Ben Kingsley though who manages with incredible skill, to bring absolute zero depth to his character and reels off his lines like he's reading a laundry list. Then there are other problems like the wholly unecessary flashbacks (especially the later one) and the info dumps put in so the audience aren't wondering whatever happened to the plot.
All that said, it could have been a lot worse. Loken fits the bill perfectly, capturing Rayne's elegance, beauty and ferocity very well. They even got her look right. The action is entertaining enough (if only because it's stupidly gory at times), but because of the fast pace it washes over you quite quickly and it ends up being moderately enjoyable despite it all.
In summary, its worth watching if you're a Bloodrayne or action/vamp. fan but don't expect too much.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
Format:DVD
Amazing fact No. 1 - This film got made.
Amazing fact No. 2 - It was deemed successful enough to spawn 2 sequels.
I have long heard of Uwe Boll as a director famous for making truly bad films. People have often compared him to Ed Wood. Being a lover of films so bad that they are funny I have long wanted to sample one of his wares in the hope of finding a new entertainment. I really wish I hadn't bothered. This film is so bad that it's not funny, it's painful.
Sloppily directed, with an exceedingly derivative script and actors so wooden they make the average thunderbirds puppet look like Olivier. I really cannot find the words with which to denigrate this film. I was actually surprised at the quality of the acting, as there are some decent names here, not least Ben Kingsley. He treats it as the ultimate paycheque role, managing to read through his lines with as little involvement in the character as possible. To be fair, most of the actors look somewhat embarrassed to be there, not least Michael Madsen.
It's awful. Avoid.
Amazing fact No. 2 - It was deemed successful enough to spawn 2 sequels.
I have long heard of Uwe Boll as a director famous for making truly bad films. People have often compared him to Ed Wood. Being a lover of films so bad that they are funny I have long wanted to sample one of his wares in the hope of finding a new entertainment. I really wish I hadn't bothered. This film is so bad that it's not funny, it's painful.
Sloppily directed, with an exceedingly derivative script and actors so wooden they make the average thunderbirds puppet look like Olivier. I really cannot find the words with which to denigrate this film. I was actually surprised at the quality of the acting, as there are some decent names here, not least Ben Kingsley. He treats it as the ultimate paycheque role, managing to read through his lines with as little involvement in the character as possible. To be fair, most of the actors look somewhat embarrassed to be there, not least Michael Madsen.
It's awful. Avoid.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
"..KRISTIANA LOKEN IS HOT.."
This is a great movie, good story, the film is low budget but still looks awesome with a great cast including the hot Kristiana loken (terminator 3) and michelle rodriguez (planet... Read more
Published 21 days ago by S. Drury
Okay?
If it's any indictment of the quality of this film,my DVD player expired halfway through watching it. Read more
Published 4 months ago by Mr. M. L. Hanford
Pretty dabolical, with just a couple of perks!
This movie really is pretty poor as far as film making goes, most of the other reviews have mentioned many of the problems with it. Read more
Published 7 months ago by R. A. Arthur
terible
after watching this for the first time i wished i could have the hour and a half back,this movie is comletely terible and considering the callaber of the actors in the movie it... Read more
Published 18 months ago by Mr. L. Montgomery
ok ish
could have been better saw it on sky thought it looked good a bit disappoited overall
Published on 10 Sep 2009 by P. MILAN
very poor
Terrible film just think the unwanted off spring of a one night stand between blade and underworld only more pathetic cant think what's the biggest loss the time wasted watching it... Read more
Published on 4 July 2009 by Mr. B. M. Hutchinson
Absolutely awful
This has to be one of the worst films I have EVER seen - acting was rubbish, storyline was confusing and just plain broing! Read more
Published on 25 Mar 2009 by purpleturtle
Stay away awfull
Dont buy dont watch just dont go near it
Mr.j.d.brown son of alice brown
Mr.j.d.brown son of alice brown
Published on 23 Feb 2009 by Mrs. Alice Brown
Half decent movie of a half decent game
Rayne is a Dhamphire, half-human and half-vampire, a side-attraction in a carnival freakshow. She makes an escape and goes on a blood rampage to eventually take on the mission of... Read more
Published on 23 Feb 2009 by Dismal Angel
Suffers from poor direction
This film has good sets, decent actors and a basis for a good story. However the lack of direction is evident from the outset. Read more
Published on 20 Oct 2008 by Charles Gosling
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