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Balls: Tales from Football's Nether Regions (Mainstream Sport) [Paperback]

Paul Brown
5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)

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Book Description

6 Oct 2005 Mainstream Sport

Balls is an eclectic collection of amazing true stories from the world of football, revealing the bizarre and hilarious reality behind the beautiful game.

Favouring left-field over legend, the book celebrates colour-blind referees, colourful commentators, dodgy kits, dodgier haircuts, footballers called 'Primrose', players with prosthetic body parts, dangerous goal celebrations, suicidal own goals, pathetic penalty misses, God-fearing goalkeepers, gun-toting fans, shocking scandals, horrendous tragedies, bung-taking managers, UFO-spotting chairmen and loopy matches involving animals, robots and Nazis.

Recalling the antics of wayward geniuses like Paul Gascoigne, Diego Maradona and George Best, the book profiles football's craziest and most colourful characters:

. What possessed a World Cup superstar to kidnap 120 Cameroonian pygmies?

. Which ex-goalkeeper genuinely believes he is the Son of God?

. Why was a former Southampton full-back offered the throne of Albania?

. Was a former Everton striker really hung for stealing a sheep in Australia?

. And whatever happened to Maradona's fake rubber penis?

Humorous and irreverent, the book presents hundreds of stories in chapters on sex, drugs, violence, rock 'n' roll and more, Balls is an unashamed celebration of the mad, bad and stupid aspects of football - the greatest game in the world.


Product details

  • Paperback: 240 pages
  • Publisher: Mainstream Publishing; New Ed edition (6 Oct 2005)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1845960637
  • ISBN-13: 978-1845960636
  • Product Dimensions: 19.3 x 11.9 x 2.8 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 5.0 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (5 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 1,705,970 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

More About the Author

Paul Brown is a writer from the North East of England. He writes primarily about football, and has written for FourFourTwo, When Saturday Comes, The Guardian and many other publications and websites.

Product Description

Review

"

'The best of the bunch' - Sports Books of the Year

" (The Independent)

"'Football has been given compendiums of curiosities before, but surely none so comprehensive, so remorseless as this . . . every page teems with anecdotes' **** " (FourFourTwo)

"'One must marvel at the research which goes in to compiling a book like this, with information culled from all over the world. Full of humour and irreverence, this is one football book that is guaranteed to raise the reader's eyebrows'."

From the Publisher

Balls is an eclectic collection of amazing true stories from the world of football, revealing the bizarre and hilarious reality behind the beautiful game.

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5 of 5 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A little bit more 5 Nov 2004
Format:Hardcover
This book contains stories that most seasoned Football fans will have heard before. Where this books scores highly is that each story always contains at least one piece of information that you probably didn't know. It's well written, humorous and reminds you that for all the Premiership millions, football can still be fun and an endless source of amusement.
The kind of book you get for Christmas and sit there reading and smiling to yourself while the kids run riot around you on Christmas morning.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Buy 22 Sep 2004
Format:Hardcover
A really entertaining look at the absurdities and eccentricities of the culture that surrounds Football. From Fat goalies, to snail paced strikers and minute centre backs, this book is a treat from start to finish.
Fans of the Danny Baker & Danny Kelly Football Phone-ins will especially be in their element as "Balls" features many of the stories that they will be familiar with including Football Groupie "Joanne" and the infamous "Wooden Bowtie" Story.
A must buy for all Football Fans with a sense of humour and Internet Treehouse fanatics.
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4 of 4 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Buy 6 Sep 2004
Format:Hardcover
A really entertaining look at the absurdities and eccentricities of the culture that surrounds Football. From Fat goalies, to snail paced strikers and minute centre backs, this book is a treat from start to finish.
Fans of the Danny Baker & Danny Kelly Football Phone-in shows will especially be in their element as "Balls" features many of the stories that featured including Football Groupie Joanne and the infamous "Wooden Bowtie" story.
A must buy for all Football Fans with a sense of humour and Internet Treehouse fanatics.
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3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
5.0 out of 5 stars An alternative view of football 21 Sep 2004
Format:Hardcover
I like reading football books but find that many autobiographies and that type of book are very boring. This is completely different. It takes the most interesting players like George Best, maradona, Gazza, Garricncha, and a player called CB Fry, plus loads more, and tells the interesting bits of their lives. It also looks at funny and bizarre stories involving fans, referees and managers. There are sections on football records, films, scandals, even football plane crashes! It is almost an encyclopedia of funny and strange stories that have happened before, only written in a continuous easy to read style. Some you will already have heard and enjoy reading again, but some you will never have heard of or even imagined (Roger Miller and the pygmies springs to mind)! Overall, this is essential for any football fan who enjoys the funny and bizarre side of football, and it is a nice sized hardback book which would make a really nice gift.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars 8 Aug 2014
By R L.
Format:Hardcover|Verified Purchase
Very funny
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