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All the Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right Mass Market Paperback – 1 Jan 2007


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All the Rules: Time-Tested Secrets for Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right + The New Rules: The dating dos and don'ts for the digital generation from the bestselling authors of The Rules + The Rules for Online Dating: Capturing the Heart of Mr. Right in Cyberspace
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Product details

  • Mass Market Paperback: 400 pages
  • Publisher: Warner Books; Reprint edition (1 Jan. 2007)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 0446618799
  • ISBN-13: 978-0446618793
  • Product Dimensions: 10.5 x 2.5 x 19 cm
  • Average Customer Review: 4.1 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (88 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: 7,926 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

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Product Description

About the Author

Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider have helped countless unmarried women find marital bliss. Ellen is studing for her Masters in social work and Sherrie is a freelance journalist. They have become chat show regulars and household names in the USA.

--This text refers to the Paperback edition.

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Customer Reviews

4.1 out of 5 stars

Most Helpful Customer Reviews

45 of 46 people found the following review helpful By Bobookfan on 24 July 2010
Format: Mass Market Paperback
At 33 I had lived with 3 previous partners and even had a child by my ex partner. I decided to read the rules because I never seemed to get man to treat me the way I wanted, not mess me around, cheat - usual stuff! I read the book and some of it is laugh out loud stuff as it seems so old fashioned. However, I met a guy on a ski trip and instead of being my usual keen self I followed the rules and held back - even doing the simple stuff suggested in the book. Well what can I say, after 9 months of dating (yes dating - not moving in together) we became engaged, married 6 months after that, living together shortly after that and now happier than I've ever been.

The main principle of the book is spot on, but use your common sense as which parts are a bit far fetched. Sime reviewers say that you aren't presenting your true self and you are duping a man into marrying you by game playing. You're not, you are still you and any man can see clearly the girl he is dating. All you're doing is not giving too much away and making him do the chasing. Dating is a game whatever way you look at it. This way you're in control and can weadle out the ones who aren't willing to go the extra mile for you.
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6 of 6 people found the following review helpful By Danni on 4 July 2011
Format: Mass Market Paperback Verified Purchase
OMG girls it really works !!!!Absolutely great so far, my only regret is that i didn't read this 10 years ago !!!
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25 of 28 people found the following review helpful By Oceanflower on 8 May 2011
Format: Mass Market Paperback
This book (in conjunction with "He's Just Not That Into You") broke my belief that I was worthless. It showed me some practical steps I could take in order to wait for a man who thought highly of me. I read this book when I was 40 and had just finished a 4 year relationship with an unemployed waster who bullied me and eventually pushed me over and raised his fist ready to punch me in the face. The only other relationship I'd had was a one-year relationship with another unemployed waster, but who was a sweet man simply going nowhere. All my other "relationships" were one or two week affairs where I would drop everything and be at the man's beck and call.

I transformed myself and my life and, feeling very embarrassed and self-conscious and thinking that no man would bother to wait for me if I wasn't readily available, I nevertheless followed the rules. The most beautiful and perfect, kind, lovely and successful man wooed me, and we are still together and so very, very happy after 4 lovely years. I still struggle with a lack of confidence but he has helped me to know that despite my reservations, I am really worthwhile and I'm about to set up my own business.

I can see why people criticise this book for suggesting that you play games, or manipulate men. But for me it was simply showing me in a practical way how I could act to give the impression that I had some self-respect, and as a result I was treated with respect, and grew to have self-respect.
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13 of 15 people found the following review helpful By Karen on 28 Aug. 2011
Format: Mass Market Paperback Verified Purchase
I've pretty much been in constant relationships since I was a teenager, and was never truly happy. I always compromised, made excuses for them or tried to pretend they'd change. Deep down I knew that something was missing and I was never treated how I wanted.

A friend told me about the Rules, and at first I was skeptical. I read it, started trying to follow it on some dates, (and slipped up at first a few times!) But I started realising how great following the Rules was, my self esteem rocketed, men started treating me like a princess and I felt great! And one of the best things about the Rules is that it teaches you to LOVE YOURSELF and IMPROVE YOURSELF. So although parts are a bit old-fashioned, it really is all about giving the woman power in the relationship. Plus it is brilliant for breaking the "bad boy" cycle, or men that use you just for sex. Because if you follow the Rules, the only men you'll end up with are perfect gentlemen who love you to pieces.

The most influential book I've ever read.
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28 of 33 people found the following review helpful By A Customer on 16 Dec. 2002
Format: Paperback
This book really doesn't deserve the criticism it has attracted. The main problem I think is that people read it and then try to do the Rules verbatim and thats difficult because of all the differing situations we are frequently in. The best rule and strangely enough the one that gets the feminists quite riled up in my opinion is the "be a creature unlike any other" - when I am doing this (and I admit it's hard to remember) I really do feel relaxed and serene and capable. Surely being that person the rest will follow on naturally? It really is the most important rule in the book. The book made me sad when I read it in some parts because I recognised all my silly mistakes and to think of the days/hours/years I must have spent messing around and agonising over someone who never panned out - no matter how much energy I expended. This book, despite being panned in many quarters, describes a way of being that will free women from that mess. It's interesting because I don't talk about the Rules very much because they are so controversial but I notice the women who oppose such games (on feminist grounds) are actually the one's who when a great guy comes into their lives they chase, agonise and despair - the Rules would save them from all that. It took a long time for me to incorporate the Rules into my life in a manageable way. I found it difficult to translate them into my own life but as per the above being a creature unlike any other really helps a lot. You don't have to do that all the time but it sure helps when one is out and about or going to a party or whatever. Also, I found it hard because often I would doubt them but take it from me - as hard and difficult as they are to do they do provide results.Read more ›
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