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Drawing comparisons to the most eloquent science writing of our day, three eminent psychiatrists tackle the difficult task of reconciling what artists and thinkers have known for thousands of years about the human heart with what has only recently been learned about the primitive functions of the human brain. The result is an original, lucid, at times moving account of the complexities of love and its essential role in human well-being.
A General Theory of Love draws on the latest scientific research to demonstrate that our nervous systems are not self-contained: from earliest childhood, our brains actually link with those of the people close to us, in a silent rhythm that alters the very structure of our brains, establishes life-long emotional patterns, and makes us, in large part, who we are. Explaining how relationships function, how parents shape their child’s developing self, how psychotherapy really works, and how our society dangerously flouts essential emotional laws, this is a work of rare passion and eloquence that will forever change the way you think about human intimacy.
A General Theory of Love draws on the latest scientific research to demonstrate that our nervous systems are not self-contained: from earliest childhood, our brains actually link with those of the people close to us, in a silent rhythm that alters the very structure of our brains, establishes life-long emotional patterns, and makes us, in large part, who we are. Explaining how relationships function, how parents shape their child’s developing self, how psychotherapy really works, and how our society dangerously flouts essential emotional laws, this is a work of rare passion and eloquence that will forever change the way you think about human intimacy.
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Two girls discover the sectret of life in a sudden line of poetry. Read the first page
Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index
Two girls discover the sectret of life in a sudden line of poetry. Read the first page
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Front Cover | Copyright | Table of Contents | Excerpt | Index
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
31 of 31 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
I came to "A General Theory of Love" through a recommendation by a leading personal coach and emotional intelligence expert. Having read it, I understand why he thought so highly of this book.
The title sounds almost contradictory, yet the authors really do elucidate the nature of love, how it is enabled and how it is suppressed. They eloquently explain how humans are essentially emotional animals, no matter how evolved our logical brains have become. They describe how this has enormous impact on how we make choices in our lives about all manner of things, in our almost blind pursuit of happiness.
This book should be high on the reading list of anyone who wants to better understand the nature of human relationships of any kind. It offers insight into the reasons for feelings and behaviours of individuals, whether in partner relationships, friendships or the workplace. Perhaps more valuably, it explains the impact of parents, partners and society on the development of a person's ability to form loving relationships and to have emotional stability, more generally.
The authors make their points eloquently throughout the book, citing plenty of academic research to validate their arguments. For those inclined to further research any aspects, there are references aplenty.
"A General Theory of Love" is beautifully written. I would recommend this book to existing or budding parents, actual or potential lovers and indeed, human beings in any culture or society.
The title sounds almost contradictory, yet the authors really do elucidate the nature of love, how it is enabled and how it is suppressed. They eloquently explain how humans are essentially emotional animals, no matter how evolved our logical brains have become. They describe how this has enormous impact on how we make choices in our lives about all manner of things, in our almost blind pursuit of happiness.
This book should be high on the reading list of anyone who wants to better understand the nature of human relationships of any kind. It offers insight into the reasons for feelings and behaviours of individuals, whether in partner relationships, friendships or the workplace. Perhaps more valuably, it explains the impact of parents, partners and society on the development of a person's ability to form loving relationships and to have emotional stability, more generally.
The authors make their points eloquently throughout the book, citing plenty of academic research to validate their arguments. For those inclined to further research any aspects, there are references aplenty.
"A General Theory of Love" is beautifully written. I would recommend this book to existing or budding parents, actual or potential lovers and indeed, human beings in any culture or society.
50 of 51 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
A bold yet delicate approach. I very much appreciated the second chapter in helping me understand the basic structure of the brain.
I believe this book to be a challenge to complacency that may exist among people working in the mental health field. It questions some assumptions that all troubles may be treated by a cognitive or behavioural approach and that the 'talking cure' may be enough.
I was delighted to read that "A capable therapist shares much with a good reader - he must willingly suspend his belief in the rules he know and approach a personal universe whose workings should be unimaginable to the uninitated".
I loved the encouragement to suspend knowing and maintain "a childlike capacity for wonder". I was both inspired and relieved to read these authors.
21 of 22 people found the following review helpful
Format:Paperback
This is such a rich book, it rewards multiple re-readings. To understand love from the perspective of science, one has to understand how the brain works, and the authors do an outstanding job of covering vast amounts of ground to enable this. It's easy to lose count of the sheer number of new insights including areas such as evolution, memory and visual perception as well as romantic and (especially) parental love.
But this is no soulless text book. Indeed, it has been criticised for being a bit flowery, and in places it is. The authors' contention is that this is a subject only art and literature have previously handled, and perhaps this is their way of paying respect to the massive insights gained over the millenia. For me, it works. It is not a typical science book by any means, and this will suit some perfectly and others not at all.
It is a shame that this is a barrier for some people. It is hard to believe that the whole world wouldn't gain from absorbing a little of the book's contents. Very readable, it rings 100% true.
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Most Recent Customer Reviews
book review
An amazing book, really explains why we think or feel certain things, emotions etc. Can't praise it highly enough. On a par with A Compassionate Mind. Both well worth buying.
Published 8 months ago by speedy
A fascinating book on love, but intriguing how it struggles with the...
This is a magnificent, rare example of beautiful and humane writing about the science and psychology of love. Read more
Published 9 months ago by Gordouli
intelligent, informed and sweet at the same time
This book takes a scientific view on human attachment patterns with some biology and neuropsychology thrown in and it manages to be sympathetic and informative at the same time. Read more
Published 14 months ago by T. O. Towry Coker
clear, poetic, essential
this book explains so much about how we create, interact and change emotionally; about the drivers of our lives. Read more
Published 21 months ago by S. F. M. Keddie
If you want to understand human beings...
You need to understand Attachment Theory if you are going to work with people or want to understand them/yourself. Read more
Published on 16 July 2008 by Zeta
Coping with reason and emotions the right way
I was surprised how little I knew about how the brain works after all my studies. The book explains convincingly that our emotions are in the limbic brain and our reasoning in the... Read more
Published on 18 Jun 2008 by laurens van den muyzenberg
emotionally enlightening
This book was recommended by a close friend in the US. After reading it ,I have already sent copies to 8 friends. Flowery? I call it poetic and accessible to a layperson like me.
Published on 6 Feb 2008 by M. Marques
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