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A Comedy of Terrors

A Comedy of Terrors [Kindle Edition]

Graeme Smith
3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)

Kindle Price: £3.66 includes VAT* & free wireless delivery via Amazon Whispernet
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Product Description

Product Description

Segorian Anderson’s an Idiot. But that’s fine with him. It’s a well paying job with no heavy lifting.

Nobody ever remembers Segorian. It isn’t magic - he just has the sort of face his own mother could forget, and she’s been trying to for years. But being forgettable is a job requirement for an Idiot.
No, he's not the Court Jester. He doesn’t wear motley (whatever motley may be). That's a different union. He’s the Idiot. In a Queen’s castle, wine spilt down the wrong dress can lead to war, so someone unimportant has to be blamed for it. That’s the Idiot’s job. He’s the Idiot that did it, for any value of ‘it’. Of course, as soon as he’s exiled-for-life out of the castle gate, he uses his back-door key and sneaks back in. But that's not all. Someday, something really bad will happen. Really, really bad. Badder than a bad thing on a very bad day with extra badness. When the world’s about to end (or the washing up won’t get done – whichever comes first), who you gonna call? No, not them. They haven’t been invented yet. You call the Idiot, someone nobody will miss if things don’t work out. And now Peladon has a case of dragon.

But the dragon may be the easy part. Segorian has woman trouble, and he’s the only person in the castle who doesn’t know it. Because to Segorian, women are an open book. The problem is, he never learned to read.

Product details

  • Format: Kindle Edition
  • File Size: 265 KB
  • Print Length: 170 pages
  • Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
  • Publisher: MuseItUp Publishing (12 Jun 2012)
  • Sold by: Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B008B6Q298
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
  • X-Ray:
  • Average Customer Review: 3.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (3 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #712,934 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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More About the Author

This is me. Graeme Smith. Fantasy writer. Mostly comic fantasy (which is fantasy intended to make you laugh, not fantasy in comics) :-).

When I'm not writing (well, or editing my writing. Or re-writing. Or editing my re-writing. Or... Quite. You get the picture), I'm doing other things. Things like wishing I could play keyboards - and not playing them, not even very badly (blushes). Things like online gaming (If you know Bard Elcano, you know me. If you know a grumpy old dragon called Sephiranoth, you know me. If you know a tall, dark, handsome but brooding vampire, charming witty and brilliant - we never met. That's someone else.) And strange midnight practices involving mushrooms. And garlic. And knitting needles. But the less said of my cooking, the better :-P.

So there you are. This is me. Graeme Smith. Short, fat, bald and ugly (fortunately my wife has lousy taste in men). Time was, I worked on a psychiatric ward. Now I write about people who believe in magic and dragons, and who live where the crazy folk are the ones who don't.

Customer Reviews

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3.7 out of 5 stars
3.7 out of 5 stars
Most Helpful Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars Bloody Brilliant, Hilarious and Unterrifying 5 Aug 2012
Format:Kindle Edition
If Stephen Fry, Rowan Atkinson, Ben Elton and Hugh Lawrie got together with Terry Pratchett, they
might have come up with something half as funny and clever as Graeme Smith's Comedy of Terrors.
I laughed through every magical hilarious page. Bloody Brilliant. Go and read it!!!

I could not, in my right mind, recommend this more highly.
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5.0 out of 5 stars Carry on Writing!! 22 Jun 2012
Format:Kindle Edition
I was told by a friend about this book and was told it was my cup of tea. They weren't wrong!
Anything that can make me laugh out loud not just once but several times has my vote.

I love Segorian the idiot for his lack of knowledge about anything to do with females and I adore Queen Sonea (Her not Majesty) for her long suffering, eye rolling exasperation.
Will she get her man? Will he ever realize that she even thinks him a man and not just an idiot? And just to make things even more confusing there is a dragon in the mix too.

This is a great farcical romp which had me chuckling all the way through. I will be looking out for more from this author.
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0 of 2 people found the following review helpful
1.0 out of 5 stars NOT FUNNY 28 Sep 2012
Format:Kindle Edition
A really good try at a Terry Pratchett kind of humour. Problem for me was that the writing techniques were repetitive. Same method to promote 'laughs' throughout the entire book. I think it was a very brave effort. I am not a writer so I do not know what the book needed - but I am an avid reader and..... it was not for me!
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews on (beta) 4.4 out of 5 stars  16 reviews
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars A rough diamond of a funny fantasy novel. It's worth polishing. 1 Jun 2013
By Esther Schindler - Published on
Format:Kindle Edition
Every movie-maker wants to find an ingenue working as a waitress and shout, "Sweetheart, I'm gonna make you a star!" And every editor (or avid reader) wants to find a hitherto-unknown author and proclaim that she has found the next Neil Gaiman, Connie Willis, Steven Brust, or your-favorite-author-du-jour.

But despite my earnest desire for talent-discovery, I've learned that you really do have to kiss a lot of frogs to find a prince, and you collect plenty of warts along the way. I want to help newbie self-published authors, honest I do, but based on the hundreds of "Please review my book!" e-mail messages I get, usually it is immediately evident why a Traditional Publisher turned down the author's manuscript and they turned to self-publishing instead. (Technical explanation: Because they suck. Sorry.)

Graeme Smith's A Comedy of Terrors is, I am happy to say, among the reasons that it's worth kissing all those frogs.

The basic setup: Our hero Segorian is the court idiot. That means it's his job to do whatever the queen asks him to do. ("No, he's not the court jester. He doesn't wear motley (whatever motley may be). That's a different union. He's the Idiot. In a Queen's castle, wine split down the wrong dress can lead to war. So someone unimportant has to be blamed for it. That's the Idiot's job.") In this story, Segorian is sent on an errand to talk to a dragon, and things get... complicated.

What Smith does well, VERY well, is write with a wonderful character voice that is extremely funny. Such as, regarding demon visitations, "...there are Rules about that sort of thing. Rules like not just turning up, knocking on the castle door, and asking people to cover themselves with salt and pepper. The demon has to be invited. So he starts whispering from the demon world to find people who'll listen. The demon offers all the usual promises, like power and wealth and really, really good tax avoidance planning." I laughed out loud several times while reading this story, and I think you might, too.

Which is not to say that A Comedy of Terrors is a perfect novel. Far from it. This prince does need to be cleaned up a bit before I'd bring him home to meet the family; a few "ribbit!"s do sneak into the conversation. The layout of the e-book needs work. There are several points at which the silliness of the style gets in the way of storytelling. I put down this book several times in the several months I've had it... but I did always pick it up again. Some books' weaknesses make me set the book aside (and occasionally throw it with great force), but in this case, the novel's imperfections made me think things like, "This guy needs a good editor to polish his work and market it effectively, and then he could be REALLY great." I dearly hope he finds one. He deserves it.

If you're willing to look past the Beginner Novel imperfections, grab a copy of A Comedy of Terrors. Then you, too, can say, "I read him before he was discovered!"
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful
4.0 out of 5 stars FUNNY READ 19 Jun 2012
By Cheryl B. Dale - Published on
Format:Kindle Edition
Okay, a quick disclaimer here. I know the author, Graeme Smith, through an online writing group, and I read one of the earlier versions of COMEDY OF TERRORS.

It made me laugh out loud then. When I reread it this weekend, it made me laugh out loud again.

The hero is the Royal Idiot who works for Queen Sonea. Anytime wine's spilled on a visiting dignitary at a state banquet or anytime the army loses a battle... It's always some idiot's fault. And Segorian is that Idiot. He shows up in the right uniform (servant or general or whatever) and gets banished from the kingdom. (Saves relations with foreign countries and keeps morale in the army high, don't you know.) Then he sneaks back through the back door, ready to be blamed again the next time an idiot is needed.

The queen kind of likes Segorian, though Segorian's a little too dense (he admits women are an open book to him but he never learned to read) to understand the situation, and sends him off on a dragon-slaying mission with some trepidation. No worries. The dragon's too smart and Segorian's too...

Let's just say the dragon turns out to be a main character who helps Segorian and Sonea tackle the bad guy who's coming to eat up all the people of the kingdom.

Oh, yeah. There's always a villain in these things. So in COMEDY, we have mayhem, murder, misunderstandings and misanthropy. All rolled up in one book.

Readers who enjoy the Myth series of Robert Asprin or the Xanth series of Piers Anthony will delight in discovering a new comic fantasy author. I know I did.
5.0 out of 5 stars Simply amazing...a read you cannot miss! 14 Feb 2014
By Zak Syed - Published on
Format:Kindle Edition
This book was very entertaining and was full of laughs! It also has a nice twist which only serves to add to the laughter! Graeme Smith’s use of irony is brilliant! Also, Mr. Smith’s sharp wit and mastery in creating unique character voices certainly makes Segorian (the Royal Idiot) a very engaging, comical, and endearing character! I love the way Segorian fully acknowledges that he’s the Queen’s Royal Idiot and that it’s his job to be blamed for things when no one else can be the scapegoat! I laughed so hard when he said that it’s a well-paying job with no heavy lifting! The book actually makes me wish that I could have such a wonderful job, if only I could find a Queen Sonea…sigh! I certainly envy Segorian! Also, Sandy the dragon is just as endearing as Segorian, and her presence in the novel only serves to make the book more exciting! I highly recommend this witty and comical creation by Mr. Smith!!
5.0 out of 5 stars COMEDY BRILLANCE you cannot miss! 18 Mar 2013
By Lady Bug Lin - Published on
Format:Kindle Edition
What do you do when you find you are reading pure genius? If you're me, you stay glued to your seat and devour every word, then call to your family member for the Krazy Glue antidote. May I say, before I continue, my butt is a tad sore. The antidote is a scraper and Krazy Glue does not give up its hold upon one's flesh easily.

That said, I have to also acknowledge to write this review I am sitting in a pan of my butt is pleasantly numb!

Okay...moving on...A COMEDY OF TERRORS by Muse It Up Author Graeme Smith is a trip into the gifted mind of a man who can spin a tale so well and with such brilliance, you laugh and then during the body shaking guffaws realize the brilliance woven within the giggles. And of course, you're going to LOVE "The Idiot."

It isn't often I can honestly say I am in the presence of tantalizing brilliance. From the title I expected it to be a pleasant romp...and from the cover I also anticipated a dragon would be somewhere in the journey...what I got was humor at its tantalizing best.

Mr. Smith wove a story so intricately linked you do not realize where the story is REALLY headed. When you find out, you are jolted and then know genius has been guiding you in spite of the obvious giggles along the way.

Well done Mr. Smith. I look forward to reading more of your brilliance.
4.0 out of 5 stars Great Read .... 31 Oct 2012
By Manuel - Published on
Format:Kindle Edition
Let me begin my review by confessing that fantasy is not normally a genre that I gravitate to in books; the title "Comedy of Terrors" caught my eye though and as such my decision to read it.

I found it a great read, fun and complex with sub-texts that are more than whimsical. Was the slow take over that was the underlying motivation for greed a parallel to our modern society? perhaps. Was the lust between the Queen and the Idiot not the stuff of fairy tales, definitely! The characters were both trite and thick with dimension at the same time. Who would consider any idiot nothing more than that in our modern society? And yet it was the idiot who was both our hero and the problem.

This is not a book for children, this is for adults to appreciate the story and characters. The double ententes and the dry oh so very British humour are part of the charm that engaged me as a reader.

If there was any negative to the story that I would mention is that there was an opportunity to put more flesh on the bones so to say; I suspect that will come with the polish of the author over time.

In short, I really recommend this tale to readers of all stripes as simple as the story may appear it is engaging and complex with subtle shades or more classical tales such as Machiavelli's dark comedy "Il Mandralogo". I look forward to reading more from the author Graeme Smith.
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